It's Friday.
There are a proven shortage of brain cells on Fridays, so let's make this easy:
Name one song that should have never been created. What is that one song that makes you want to take the "artist" out back and spray yak urine up their nose til they cry Uncle...
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7 comments:
Shania Twain's "Man, I Feel Like a Woman."
When I first heard it a decade ago, I could take it or leave it. Now it makes me want to drive my car into a wall. At this rate, who knows what will happen in 30 years when that shite comes on the radio? (And you know it will. Why oh why won't that song just fade into obscurity like so many better songs have?)
i hate the one that just says: "Saturday, Saturday- Sat-urday, Saturday, Saturday..." on and on forever. Makes me want to punch myself in the ears.
I have always hated Meatloaf's alleged masterpiece, "I'd Anything For Love, But I Won't Do That." It's never a good sign when the title of the song is actually the entire chorus. Its length is a torturous twelve minutes long, and the hook line is repeated about a thousand times, sometimes with a different cadence, like he's going to trick us into believing there's more to this epic song than there is.
And are we supposed to be okay with not knowing what the "anything" he's so passionate about is? I remember that topic was debated on the St. Louis morning radio show I listened to. People were really arguing their theories from the bottom of their hearts. I knew it was pathetic then, and I was only twelve.
Renny, the "that" is fully explained when the woman sings her verse.
"Would you build me up, would you let me down..."
Followed by Meatloaf's "I woooooon't do that...."(repeated 50 million times).
I know this because Mike and I had a major bet on whether or not that song was in fact a duet. (It is) But, as you noted and as we found out, it is a whooping 12 minutes long and thus a very shitty karaoke choice.
I'd fancy myself an aficionado of music that other people seem to hate. When "Rick Rolling" someone grew popular, I said "Good. Rick Astley needed a renaissance." I still don't know what a Hollaback Girl is, but I like songs that spell out things I'm familiar with (but not too much... "Fergalicious" overdoes it a touch; I feel like I'm listening to a song with captions).
Hell, I'm only just slightly embarrassed to sing the guy parts of Aqua's indomitable "Barbie Girl."
All that said, when you take two extraordinarily talented musicians and put them together to produce arguably the stupidest song ever conceived of about, ostensibly, racial harmony, even my good taste is offended.
My contribution is Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder "Ebony and Ivory."
Even the music video is depressingly lame:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sssqBjaTzOU
Lydia,
Were there beer cans whizzing by your head around minute eight of your and Mike's karaoke showcase? I'm picturing it and laughing.
Yeah, I definitely meant to say "that" instead of "anything." It was rumored that the song was about Meatloaf being a vampire and his lady wanted him to bite her. So he would do anything except turn her into a vampire. It's hard to express how lame that is, but I think you and Mike probably did the torrid story justice with your vocal stylings.
I absolutely cannot stand JC Chasez's song called "All Day Long I Dream about Sex". That's all the song says for like 3.5 minutes.
Isn't that what everyone thought adidas stood for in 3rd grade?
What an idiot. If I ever saw him I would say, "All day long I dream about how many times I can drop kick you in the face before the police come to take me to jail. Then I would tell them about your song and they would assist me with the drop-kicking". Idiot.
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